Yes. Plus, your comic also describes my reaction to the false rape accusation that was made against me (a man) by a vindictive ex (a woman). I suspect the feelings and damage transcend sex and gender.
And its always about men, constantly about men. Yes sometimes its not about you. You have zero idea. You have no idea between what its like to go out as a man and what its like to go out as a woman. I do, some days I wish I didn’t. You don’t know the different dangers, You don’t know the threat, you don’t know what its like to be physically intimidated, to talk to people who won’t listen or talk to your chest. People who grab you and try to fondle you or kiss you and tell them no and you are a bitch or have “no sense of humor”. That’s of course if you are lucky. I do, and the difference is more than I can put to words. I have more words, but they are quite unprintable.
Why you can’t already apply this comic and message for male victims of abuse makes me think it’s not about abused male victims or being treated “fair.”
Please don’t ask me “well what about men?” It happens to men too. It happens to people of all races and ethnicities. It happens within the same gender. It happens to people of all orientations. It happens to poor people, middle class people, and rich people. We all know this, it need not be said but for some reason there are men who instead of trying to empathize with a victim feel slighted if they aren’t specifically represented.
Note that they tend to only bring it up when the abuser/assaulter is male and the victim female. They stay silent and /or shame when the victim is male (unless to comment about female being attractive) and even moreso if the abuser/assaulter is also male. (Ex. Catholic churches and Anthony Rapp and Terry Crews’ testimonies)
Thanks, I really should do a comic where both the assailant and the victim is male. Toxic masculinity really does a number on the survivors of this crime.
I’m sorry this needs to be said, and I’m sorry that a nation lost its sense of justice because many people did not want to believe what a woman could remember.
The worst are people who also claim to have had PTSD and tell you that because you don’t remember certain things, there’s no way that you have PTSD or that the event actually happened to you as you say it did. Because THEY know what YOU should be feeling or remembering because they’ve “been there too”. Had this conversation with someone regarding Dr. Blasey Ford. Because she apparently didn’t experience the PTSD from the trauma in the same way this other person did, obviously she was lying and it didn’t happen. People like that are arguably just as bad as the perpetrators.
What happened with Ford was the inspiration for this. I would have had the comic out sooner, but there was a time that doing something like this within two weeks would be considered recent, nowadays it’s too late.
Recent events reminded me of your earlier comic https://www.depressioncomix.com/posts/207/ I sent the link to a few people, and they said, “oh yes. That’s exactly what it’s like!”
Your new comic is also right on target. People need to understand what rape and sexual assault does to others. It’s not a game, and the victims are fellow human beings, not toys to be played with and discarded.
I wish I could just give this character and everybody who survived sexual assault a hug. Then go back in time and kick the perpetrators in the crotches before they do it.
Ohhhh, yes, this. I live in the same town as some of my old bullies, including some who cheered on the guy who sexually assaulted me in the school library. They want to do the social thing with me. They introduce me to their partners and kids. (I did a thing that got me a little bit famous, in a local way, back then.) I look at them and I think, “What. What the hell. I remember the smirks on your faces. You’re the reason I was afraid of people smiling, groups of teenagers, sitting where I couldn’t see all of the doors, laughter, etc., etc., for years. I spent my late mother’s life insurance policy on undoing what you did to me, instead of using it to launch me into life. And now you want to be buddies?”
This. I survived a murder attempt using a pickup truck as a weapon. I remember what street I was on, but not where the assault began because it started much earlier than where it ended up. I remember the color of the truck but not the make or model. I vividly remembering having to slow down because the wind was blowing the water off my front tire into my face and glasses, and the sound of the driver telling me to “get off the fvcking road” when there weren’t even sidewalks to ride on. I remember the first time he yelled he was going the other way on the opposite side of the median and that he had to make a u-turn to get on the same side of the street I was riding on, and I remember riding by the driveway where I got hit, but not the actual impact, and hearing him yell at me again. The next thing I remember is telling people to be careful because I had broken the upper end of my femur. Well I remember some other stuff, but it wasn’t in this world.
can you make a post about how women abuse men? just to be fair that is all.
or you can just empathize with a woman and think “that can happen to anyone.”
Yes. Plus, your comic also describes my reaction to the false rape accusation that was made against me (a man) by a vindictive ex (a woman). I suspect the feelings and damage transcend sex and gender.
And its always about men, constantly about men. Yes sometimes its not about you. You have zero idea. You have no idea between what its like to go out as a man and what its like to go out as a woman. I do, some days I wish I didn’t. You don’t know the different dangers, You don’t know the threat, you don’t know what its like to be physically intimidated, to talk to people who won’t listen or talk to your chest. People who grab you and try to fondle you or kiss you and tell them no and you are a bitch or have “no sense of humor”. That’s of course if you are lucky. I do, and the difference is more than I can put to words. I have more words, but they are quite unprintable.
Why you can’t already apply this comic and message for male victims of abuse makes me think it’s not about abused male victims or being treated “fair.”
Please don’t ask me “well what about men?” It happens to men too. It happens to people of all races and ethnicities. It happens within the same gender. It happens to people of all orientations. It happens to poor people, middle class people, and rich people. We all know this, it need not be said but for some reason there are men who instead of trying to empathize with a victim feel slighted if they aren’t specifically represented.
Note that they tend to only bring it up when the abuser/assaulter is male and the victim female. They stay silent and /or shame when the victim is male (unless to comment about female being attractive) and even moreso if the abuser/assaulter is also male.
(Ex. Catholic churches and Anthony Rapp and Terry Crews’ testimonies)
Thanks, I really should do a comic where both the assailant and the victim is male. Toxic masculinity really does a number on the survivors of this crime.
Just wanted to comment that your art keeps getting better and better. ❤
Thank you for the kind words about the art. I’ve been trying to improve and try new things even though the look of the comic changes.
Thank you so much for making this
Repeating: thank you so much for this, Clay.
Thank you for capturing the pain so perfectly and eloquently.
I’m sorry this needs to be said, and I’m sorry that a nation lost its sense of justice because many people did not want to believe what a woman could remember.
Thank you. Nothing wrong with trying new things. If we didn’t do that we wouldn’t learn what we’re capable of achieving.
The worst are people who also claim to have had PTSD and tell you that because you don’t remember certain things, there’s no way that you have PTSD or that the event actually happened to you as you say it did. Because THEY know what YOU should be feeling or remembering because they’ve “been there too”. Had this conversation with someone regarding Dr. Blasey Ford. Because she apparently didn’t experience the PTSD from the trauma in the same way this other person did, obviously she was lying and it didn’t happen. People like that are arguably just as bad as the perpetrators.
What happened with Ford was the inspiration for this. I would have had the comic out sooner, but there was a time that doing something like this within two weeks would be considered recent, nowadays it’s too late.
I figured.
Reactions to trauma can take a lot of different forms. No two people respond the same way to trauma. I’m sorry you had to deal with that.
Recent events reminded me of your earlier comic https://www.depressioncomix.com/posts/207/ I sent the link to a few people, and they said, “oh yes. That’s exactly what it’s like!”
Your new comic is also right on target. People need to understand what rape and sexual assault does to others. It’s not a game, and the victims are fellow human beings, not toys to be played with and discarded.
I wish I could just give this character and everybody who survived sexual assault a hug. Then go back in time and kick the perpetrators in the crotches before they do it.
Ohhhh, yes, this. I live in the same town as some of my old bullies, including some who cheered on the guy who sexually assaulted me in the school library. They want to do the social thing with me. They introduce me to their partners and kids. (I did a thing that got me a little bit famous, in a local way, back then.) I look at them and I think, “What. What the hell. I remember the smirks on your faces. You’re the reason I was afraid of people smiling, groups of teenagers, sitting where I couldn’t see all of the doors, laughter, etc., etc., for years. I spent my late mother’s life insurance policy on undoing what you did to me, instead of using it to launch me into life. And now you want to be buddies?”
But it was so long ago. Tra la.
This. I survived a murder attempt using a pickup truck as a weapon. I remember what street I was on, but not where the assault began because it started much earlier than where it ended up. I remember the color of the truck but not the make or model. I vividly remembering having to slow down because the wind was blowing the water off my front tire into my face and glasses, and the sound of the driver telling me to “get off the fvcking road” when there weren’t even sidewalks to ride on. I remember the first time he yelled he was going the other way on the opposite side of the median and that he had to make a u-turn to get on the same side of the street I was riding on, and I remember riding by the driveway where I got hit, but not the actual impact, and hearing him yell at me again. The next thing I remember is telling people to be careful because I had broken the upper end of my femur. Well I remember some other stuff, but it wasn’t in this world.