Commentary from Published June 29, 2016
There is a pressure to be strong and masculine for men, which is pronounced especially in minority groups, and it interferes with their ability to seek help. Now, this is actually true of everyone to some extent, but the strip hasn’t focused on “masculine” problems and I wanted to be sure the strip was balanced before I went in this direction. (I’ve been asked to do work support groups about mental illness that were specifically male only, and I’ve declined every time. This is not because I don’t believe males need support too, it’s that I believe in an inclusive approach).
“Man up.” I hate that phrase. It’s usually said by men who think they have a stronger grasp what it is to be a man than other people.
I had a rough draft in my idea book for a while, and went through several versions of it. For example, in one draft the main character would be talking to the camera, but I rejected that because it seemed rather dull. But having two people talk about it, I’d need a panel to give a set up space. I juggled this around for probably about four months. Even when I finally thought I had it and started drawing it, I changed the dialogue in the last panel. I’m probably not 100% happy with the final result, but it’s done. That’s the good thing about deadlines, I guess, it forces completion even when you’re not entirely satisfied with the result.
“Man up.” I hate that phrase. It’s usually said by men who think they have a stronger grasp what it is to be a man than other people.
I had a rough draft in my idea book for a while, and went through several versions of it. For example, in one draft the main character would be talking to the camera, but I rejected that because it seemed rather dull. But having two people talk about it, I’d need a panel to give a set up space. I juggled this around for probably about four months. Even when I finally thought I had it and started drawing it, I changed the dialogue in the last panel. I’m probably not 100% happy with the final result, but it’s done. That’s the good thing about deadlines, I guess, it forces completion even when you’re not entirely satisfied with the result.
“Man up.” “Grow a pair.” “Get your shit together.” People are a lot of fun. 🙁
Man up. Hoo boy how many times have I heard variations of that especially from my father when he was alive.
I’ll say it again; replace any other affliction with “depression,” and listen to how ridiculous it sounds.
“Have you *tried* not being diabetic?”
“If you get some exercise, your leukemia will go away.”
“You dont have asthma, you just need to smile more.”
Actually, I was told the last one, almost word by word 🙁
Jesus. “Walk it off” people are a fucking affliction in themselves
Yup, that’s how it is being black and having depression. I’ve be told flat out that black people cant get depression, like it was lice or something. =
Son of a…
What.
Because.
It.
I know, I know, cockamamie ideas can flourish without a rational basis, but if black people couldn’t get depression, wouldn’t there be a billion-dollar research effort all up into that, trying to figure out how it worked so depression would stop killing people?!
At least the one “therapist” (sic!) who listened to me describe my symptoms of depression and then leaned over the desk and barked “SNAP OUT OF IT!” was shown the door at her group practice. The thought of this being institutionalized just chills my blood.
You’re here, you’re breathing: you’re awesome. Hang in there.
That’s a lot of pressure for men to deal with.
Agreed… Sweet reply
Toxic masculinity. 🙁
There CAN be things that help depression lessen. See a psychiatrist first. Then maybe a therapist. And support groups of your peers with similar problems.
I’ve had bipolar disorder for 20+ years and anxiety disorders for about 10+ years. Things get better, then worse, then better – it’s cyclical. You have to try to work at it.
Most of all, you have to try to be honest with yourself, and ask for help. Demand it. If you are able to.
That’s the tricky part, unfortunately. So many people CAN’T ask for help.
anyone else love as much as me
Not entirely relevant to the topic of the comic this time, but I’ve been reading a lot of the past comics one-after-the-other and I just wanted to say that your art has been improved a lot! Like it was fairly good before but lately it feels like it has its own style and polish that really stand out. Really like the way you’ve been drawing lately!
Recently I’ve reverted to my previous style, using nib pens instead of thick brush markers, and changing the size at which I draw to allow finer detail. This probably looks more like my Sexy losers work than the American newspaper comic strip style I was attempting before.
The most dangerous thing you can say to a man…”man up” “grow a pair” etc
My favorite line, “Just Get Over It.” :'(