Commentary from December 20, 2013
Every mistake, no matter how small, seems to scream this at me.
I didn’t use much of my brush pen for this, opting for a liner pen for most of it, so it has a bit of a different look. It worked really well for the first two panels.
The last couple of strips, although extremely popular (#159 was the most popular depcom strip I ever did on Tumblr) so it was time to retreat to negative territory again before I get accused of romanticizing depression again. Really. Do a couple of positive strips and people ignore the previous 150+ strips that were called “bleak” on metafilter.
I didn’t use much of my brush pen for this, opting for a liner pen for most of it, so it has a bit of a different look. It worked really well for the first two panels.
The last couple of strips, although extremely popular (#159 was the most popular depcom strip I ever did on Tumblr) so it was time to retreat to negative territory again before I get accused of romanticizing depression again. Really. Do a couple of positive strips and people ignore the previous 150+ strips that were called “bleak” on metafilter.
Been there, done that – for every minor fuck-up in my life… 🙁
A couple weeks ago, I gave in an bought myself a bottle of wine. (I’m a grown adult, I’m perfectly deserving of having a glass of wine from time to time, and I’ve been working a great deal, etc) As soon as I stepped into the parking lot from the store, I needed to get my keys out of my pocket. In doing so, the bottle and the bag holding it fell straight down. My exact thoughts were, “Of course. This is what happens when I try to do something nice for myself.” Thank you for these – it’s really peace-bringing to relate to your strips and not feel so alone 🙂
I’ve had days where I dropped my keys and that was the thing that made me decide to sleep all day instead.
Earlier today, I started reading your work from the beginning.
I had no idea how long the comic would run, and I kept expecting to reach the final strip, but 2011 passed, then 2012, then most of 2013, and suddenly I reached the present.
I can’t express how much hope that gives me, that you’re still here.
Thank you.
I don’t plan on going anywhere. There was definitely a time I did make that plan, but thankfully it never happened. Making this comic helps me get through it.
I’m so happy that making these comics have helped you! These comics have helped me at my darkest times, so I want to take this moment out of my day to truly thank you for being there when I was so close from giving up. <3
Keep it up…..
I’ve been two steps from a CO Hibachi exit since I was in my teens…
Still here, still trying to find a way to stretch out my stint on this planet.
Hope your day is going well 🙂
Oh, yes, I’ve been here. Many, many times. A simple mistake is never just a simple mistake. A simple mistake is an indictment of your entire worth as a human being, one more piece of evidence that you’re a hopeless fuck-up and nothing will ever change for you. What’s worse is that on some level you realize the irrationality of reaching a conclusion like that and yet it makes no difference in how you feel about it.
I’m very glad I found this comic. Its remarkably therapeutic to find someone putting into words so many of the experiences I’ve had suffering from depression. There are a number of strips that could have been written from my own past, nearly word for word.
Its just good to be reminded now and again that you aren’t alone in feeling like this, especially when so many people around you have such difficulty understanding it.
This is super relevant to the way my low points spiral into a meltdown. I’ve literally had a week-long emotional and self-destructive breakdown after spilling a bowl of soup onto my livingroom carpet once. And another shorter-lived one after accidentally breaking a friend’s necklace while out one night. It’s always the smaller, less “pertinent” things that seem to just tip it all over with some kind of symbolism that makes sense to your Depression!Brain (you ruin/break everything, see?!), and BAM! The familiar self-aimed hatred and hopelessness punches you in the face.
Almost. Every. Minute. When I’m Depressed.
Should have been milk instead of apple juice.
I think I avoided milk because the phrase “No sense crying over spilled milk” was something I wanted to avoid.
talk, breathe, wink, think, eat, drink, sleep, wake up, stand, and sit, walk, run, sprint, and jump…. anything you do without exceptions is an insult to your life because you mess up everything without exception …